Ask Abbie: Identity crisis time

Greetings beloveds. Have you eaten at least a third of your calories for the day yet? No matter what time of day it is, you should have probably either have already eaten at minimum a third of your daily caloric needs! If not, this is a sign to please eat something! Your brain glucose will thank you. Not to mention you will also receive some telepathic ~messages~ from me if you do so, so there we go, you must eat something. 

I was recently talking to a friend about our high school selves versus our college selves and how we have changed, if at all, over the years. We discussed how our appearances, thoughts and ways of living had changed from being a high school student to where we stand now in college and how it impacted our life. There is no doubt about it; different experiences will lend itself to change in some way or another, and while people give change a ton of flack, it can be a beneficial aspect of life! 

However, while change can be good, it can also be confusing, difficult and scary. Whether it’s something big or small, change can lead to the all too familiar identity crisis. Take, for example, the clothes that you wear. While you may feel comfortable in one style of clothes at one point in your life, a split second later, these apparel choices may feel completely foreign to you. While my personal identity crises take form in clothing and style choices, I know that it is an aspect of my identity that actually stems from entirely different aspects of what is going on in my outside life and personal brain waves. 

For example, when I came to college as a first year student, I still dressed in my British prep-school aesthetic that I developed throughout high school. However, almost immediately I felt entirely wrong in my own appearance. At the time I didn’t even know what I wanted to wear or what my actual style was. All I knew was that none of the clothes I bought felt entirely right, as though my outward appearance did not represent who I was as a person. 

Over the course of my four years of college, I have tried out different styles that I thought represented me at the time. One semester I was pointy-heeled-boots-glam, the next I was a surfer grunge and the one after that I was “emo” according to one of my professors who told me I was, based on how I solely wore all-black to his class. 

While half of the time I was in total confusion as to who I was and how I wanted to portray myself to the world, not to mention having an existential crisis over how people were perceiving me, I realized that every “identity crisis” was linked to a big change in my life in some way or another. What was going on with my family, friends and inward self came out in my appearance. As I was growing and changing as a human based on experiences, my personal style was also changing with me, and it still is! 

Long story short, whatever form your identity ciris takes, if any, know that it is entirely normal and that you will probably endure many throughout your lifetime! They can be scary and confusing and your brain may feel as though it is in turmoil, but honestly it will make you become the person you’re supposed to be, as cheesy as that sounds. On that note, make a charcuterie board tonight or tomorrow or the day after that. Remember what I said above, this is your “eat food” sign!